Spin Class

by BB Curtis

When I first heard that expression, “Spin Class,” I thought it might have something to do with a dance-like exercise program with, maybe, some ballet moves such as pirouettes or one of those twisting disc exercise devices where the teacher has choreographed the workout to include a balance of moves.  Well, much to my dismay, it is a class on riding a stationary bike.  Do we need lessons in riding a bike that goes nowhere?  This isn’t something where we can just get on the stationary bike that is part of the standard equipment in any gym anywhere and pump, pump, pump our legs for a specific length of time?  These stationary bikes, in nearly every case, have some type of computerized settings that increase/decrease the tension so that it runs from beginner to expert and can also emulate going up and down hills, etc., along with a built-in timer.  We are not able to do this on our own?  I can’t imagine why one needs to pay extra to be in a room with strangers and a teacher to tell everyone how to sit on a bike that goes nowhere and move your feet around in circles. I can’t think of words dumb enough to express how incredibly stupid that sounds.  I can’t.  It ranks up there with coffee shops with specialty stuff that costs as much for a single cup of coffee as it does to buy a pound of coffee at the grocery store to make about 32 cups at home.  Are we that lazy?  Do we crave attention from a leader-person that much?  Do we require comradery that is artificially created? Are we so easily led that we hear something that is different from yesterday and get so excited about it that we will cough up between $15 and $25 ($30 in New York City)  per walk-in class to spend time with people we do not know to make our feet go around?  In most cases, this is a cost on top of the gym membership that can run between about $10 to $135 per month. Bundled deals run from about $170 a year to $165 a month or more, depending on how bougie you really are and where you live. In addition, most people feel like they have to have special workout clothes.  One very popular brand costs an average of $100 for a pair of PANTS ONLY.  Then, we have specialty shoes.  These shits start at about $95 a pair at a discount store on clearance and go up to over a few hundred depending on what their intended “special” use is. Some folks allow themselves to be talked into buying 3 or so pairs of differing specialty shoes so they can go to the gym and take these useless classes that they pay for. 

I have a secret for you.  Shhhhhhhh, don’t say this too loudly.  You can buy a stationary bike for about the ONE-TIME cost of one pair of pants you don’t need and one pair of cheap-end shoes you don’t need.  That’s right, you can get a good quality stationary bike for about $200, and there is no requirement for some sort of computerized lessons/monitoring with a monthly fee.  There are some that are less expensive.  Shop around.  You save time (it’s in your house), the cost of transportation to the gym and back home, the cost of the membership and classes, the cost of special clothes and shoes to feel like you fit in with people you don’t know, and you can monitor your weight and measurements on a free app on your phone if pencil and paper don’t work for you.  You can also do your bike ride after working in the yard or whatever without showering and primping first before going to the gym to have to do it again when you get home, saving more time and money.  You can wear a pair of comfy shorts, and a tee shirt you already own.

The bottom line:

• You can do this at a gym and spend between $1000 per year on the cheap end to easily more than $5000 a year
• You can buy the bike for $200 and put all that other money to better use elsewhere

The part that got this all started in my head:  USA adults need to take classes to make their feet go around in circles, but our kids go outside in the sunshine and ride bikes that cost less than $150 if their mom and dad are on a budget and actually go somewhere after mom or dad teach them how to not fall off.

Thank you, Arsenio Hall, for, “Things that make you go hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.”

© 2023, Bobbi Bartsch Curtis. All rights reserved.